Memories are important, well the good ones at least. I have a favorite one as I'm sure you all do. I'll let you in on it and then I'd like you to tell me yours.
I was born in Tunisia. For those of you who don't know it's the Northern most country in Africa next to Morocco. Every summer I'd go there and stay at my grandparents' house on the beach. One morning, I woke up as the sun began to rise. The sunrise there is pretty special. The sky is purple and orange and the sun's rays sparkle on the water like diamonds. I stood on the balcony and watched as a fisherman rowed his little wooden boat out to sea. The image reminded me of a Monet painting.
Later that day, I watched my grandmother dressed in a long skirt and heels have her afternoon drink. Although she was in her seventies she still had a glass of Johnny Walker in one hand and cigarette in the other. She had big Jackie O sunglasses on and makeup fit for a movie close up. She was a dramatic woman and it felt like she was starring in her own film at all times. She was looking out at the sea and when I called her name she turned abruptly. She was crying. I'll never know why. Maybe she was remembering her daughter that had died 15 years ago or because she'd never made it as an actress. I wish I could have take a picture. It was surreal. Later on, I was playing with the cats that inhabited the big garden. My grandfather was sick, we'd find out later that he had cancer. I guess I was making too much noise because all of a sudden I heard a terrifying howl come from his room. I had woken up the beast within and he was not pleased. He came out with the ferociousness of a lion and started swinging his cane in the air as obscenities emerged from his cries. My mother was there along with my cousin and brothers and we all hid in the fig tress too frightened to climb down. We were laughing so hard our sides hurt because the whole situation was comical. It felt like a Marx brothers movie. My grandmother who was on her fourth or fifth drink slammed her bedroom door and I could hear her yelling from within.
I don't know why but this memory is dear to my heart. My grandparents are dead today and the house on the beach has been sold. I still dream of it sometimes. I still dream of the times when we were all a family, a dysfunctional one but still a family. I long for those days of heavenly sunrises and hilarious outbursts due to too much whiskey or out of control egos. Maybe one day I will see that house on the beach again...
Till next time.
Thursday, April 29, 2010
Tuesday, April 27, 2010
REMEMBER... REMEMBER...
Amidst all the chaos and noise and corruption we have forgotten why we are here. This planet is a test... well it could be. Something more powerful than us that we cannot understand made our lives here possible. The problem is that we have nothing left to hope for, to love or to work for. There's so much darkness and sadness clouding this planet that we have no idea what life is all about. Greed. Power. Envy. Anger. Hate. Discrimination. Do you even remember what a good life is? Hundreds of years ago I'd be willing to bet my life that people were much happier. Life was simple and the age of technology and corrupt leaders hadn't even been born. We find ourselves fighting a battle that doesn't have anything to do with us. Stop and think for moment. What happened to finding your soulmate? What happened to visiting new countries and learning about the world? What happened in doing a job that satisfies you creatively and mentally? These are questions that have gone down the toilet like a dead goldfish because are minds have been intoxicated with believing that they are delusions. Well they're not. They're real and if you really tried to make them happen they will. You'll need a deep cleanse of your mind, body and soul first. We're drowning in a sea of hate but the beach is right there in front of us... just a few meters away. Sadly, life has persuaded us that it's just an illusion.
That is our tragedy...
That is our tragedy...
Monday, April 26, 2010
TEMPTATION: THE GOOD, THE BAD AND THE UGLY
The joys of temptation. You begin to feel tingly all over and you know a desire or fantasy is about to come true. It's almost like the Apple in the Garden of Eden. You know you want to but there is always a price to pay. Sometimes you want it so badly that you'd put your life at stake. Is it worth it? Well, it depends on what it is your heart desires. For some it could be another woman, escaping from life in an opium den in Thailand or climbing Mount Kilimanjaro. You know the moments I'm talking about. Your skin feels all prickly and you can actually hear your heartbeat. So should one say yes or no to temptation? Well, ladies and gents that depends.
Let's look at one scenario. Jack is a middle-aged man who's been in a marriage that was passionate and fun for about fifteen seconds but now it's been ten years and his wife has turned into his worst nightmare. A blend of Glenn Close in "Fatal Attraction" and Annette Bening in "American Beauty." She's lost all desire for him and complains all day long. When he gets home she throws daggers at his soul filled with her toxic words. One sunny day, Jack meets a beautiful girl. She's like a Pre- Raphaelite painting. She makes him feel alive again and he can finally breathe. Her smile has all sorts of messages hidden behind it. Come to me. Let me take care of you. Use me to escape this dreadful relationship you're bound to. Should Jack get lost in her world or should he be honorable and continue his simple and lifeless existence? I'm not advocating being unfaithful but I say go for it Jack. Sometimes we need to do something to make us feel whole again even though it goes against what society deems to be right or wrong. Jack may try to reignite the flame in his marriage due to his current fruitful affair. It may wake up the love he once had for his wife that has remained dormant for such a long time.
Another tale would be a young, naive girl moving to the big city. She has high hopes of becoming a star. Unfortunately, the wolves spot her at once and feed off her naivete and youth. Within a couple of months, she's entangled in drugs and sex leaving her bitter and lost. The drugs and the sex fool her into believing that she's a golden goddess until the sun begins to rise. Then, the cold light of morning strips the veil of lies from her eyes and she sees that she's sleeping on a mattress on the floor of a filthy apartment with junkies who already have one foot in the box. Was it worth it to fill the void with lies and deceit because some greasy liar told you he'd make you a star. Yes, it's tempting to live fast and emulate those rock videos where sex, drugs and rock-n-roll seem to be your magic carpet ride to fame and fortune. Before you know it you look down and there's only a void and you fall to pieces.
Well... what do you think? Right now you now you have one. Give in... or run for the hills?
Till next time...
Let's look at one scenario. Jack is a middle-aged man who's been in a marriage that was passionate and fun for about fifteen seconds but now it's been ten years and his wife has turned into his worst nightmare. A blend of Glenn Close in "Fatal Attraction" and Annette Bening in "American Beauty." She's lost all desire for him and complains all day long. When he gets home she throws daggers at his soul filled with her toxic words. One sunny day, Jack meets a beautiful girl. She's like a Pre- Raphaelite painting. She makes him feel alive again and he can finally breathe. Her smile has all sorts of messages hidden behind it. Come to me. Let me take care of you. Use me to escape this dreadful relationship you're bound to. Should Jack get lost in her world or should he be honorable and continue his simple and lifeless existence? I'm not advocating being unfaithful but I say go for it Jack. Sometimes we need to do something to make us feel whole again even though it goes against what society deems to be right or wrong. Jack may try to reignite the flame in his marriage due to his current fruitful affair. It may wake up the love he once had for his wife that has remained dormant for such a long time.
Another tale would be a young, naive girl moving to the big city. She has high hopes of becoming a star. Unfortunately, the wolves spot her at once and feed off her naivete and youth. Within a couple of months, she's entangled in drugs and sex leaving her bitter and lost. The drugs and the sex fool her into believing that she's a golden goddess until the sun begins to rise. Then, the cold light of morning strips the veil of lies from her eyes and she sees that she's sleeping on a mattress on the floor of a filthy apartment with junkies who already have one foot in the box. Was it worth it to fill the void with lies and deceit because some greasy liar told you he'd make you a star. Yes, it's tempting to live fast and emulate those rock videos where sex, drugs and rock-n-roll seem to be your magic carpet ride to fame and fortune. Before you know it you look down and there's only a void and you fall to pieces.
Well... what do you think? Right now you now you have one. Give in... or run for the hills?
Till next time...
Thursday, April 22, 2010
DO YOU BELIEVE IN FATE?
The ancient Greeks were great believers in fatalism, which means that whatever happens is predestined. We find this belief all over the world, not only throughout history but in our own days as well. In the past, people used to go to oracles to foresee the future. Today many people believe that they can tell your fortune in the cards, read your palm, or predict your future in the stars.
So is it true? Can no man escape his destiny?
There are so many great individuals that famous for doing extraordinary things. Benjamin Franklin, Thomas Edison, William Shakespeare, Moses and so many more. Were these people supposed to become great? Was there future set in stone? There are so many instances where if a series of events hadn't occurred we may have still been living without electricity, famous cathedrals or musical instruments. I believe they were destined for greatness because in the long run it aided humanity in evolving as a species.
Do you remember the day you saw your soul mate? I bet you do. Whether or not anything grew from that first encounter isn't important. They were put in your path for a reason. Maybe you did nothing about it because you were married or depressed or too broke to even think about being in a relationship but you knew in the deepest, darkest corners of your soul that they were the one. Would it have made a difference in your life if you'd reacted to the encounter or none at all? Hundreds of years ago people believed that it would make or break your chances of being somebody or attaining happiness or success. Today we don't really pay much attention to such things and move along rather quickly without thinking about such encounters for too long.
I believe that life is a test. There are moments that will define our future but the question remains... are these moments predestined? Is your future already written somewhere in the Universe?
I'd like for you to tell me what you think.
Till next time...
So is it true? Can no man escape his destiny?
There are so many great individuals that famous for doing extraordinary things. Benjamin Franklin, Thomas Edison, William Shakespeare, Moses and so many more. Were these people supposed to become great? Was there future set in stone? There are so many instances where if a series of events hadn't occurred we may have still been living without electricity, famous cathedrals or musical instruments. I believe they were destined for greatness because in the long run it aided humanity in evolving as a species.
Do you remember the day you saw your soul mate? I bet you do. Whether or not anything grew from that first encounter isn't important. They were put in your path for a reason. Maybe you did nothing about it because you were married or depressed or too broke to even think about being in a relationship but you knew in the deepest, darkest corners of your soul that they were the one. Would it have made a difference in your life if you'd reacted to the encounter or none at all? Hundreds of years ago people believed that it would make or break your chances of being somebody or attaining happiness or success. Today we don't really pay much attention to such things and move along rather quickly without thinking about such encounters for too long.
I believe that life is a test. There are moments that will define our future but the question remains... are these moments predestined? Is your future already written somewhere in the Universe?
I'd like for you to tell me what you think.
Till next time...
Wednesday, April 21, 2010
THE PERFECT DATE
What is the perfect date? Is there even such a thing? It's different for everybody. For some it could be a candlelit dinner followed by a long walk on the beach. For others it could be trying a new exotic restaurant together and salsa dancing to end the night. There's no right or wrong answer here. It's simply a matter of taste. Isn't it funny though how wrong a date can be? You spend so much time planning it and overanalyzing every single detail that it ends up doing quite a number on your nerves. Here is my idea of the perfect date.
To begin with, I have to admit that I have a penchant for men with long hair, tattoos don't hurt either. I've been this way since I was 15. So my date would start off by picking me up in an old car, preferably one from the 60's or 70's. He would knock on my door and he would wait a little before I opened up... make him sweat a bit. I would then open the front door in a black, vintage mini-dress and black, knee-high boots. These are not important facts but it's all in the details. He would be wearing faded jeans and a leather jacket. His hair would be down and he would smell like a man. There's nothing worse than being attacked by overpriced cologne. We would size each other up for a minute longing for the end of the night when that first kiss would happen. Sorry but you have to work for the meaningful things in life. Too much too soon has never been on my agenda. Like I said, a little sweating never hurt anybody. After the brief five minute physical approval we would drive off to a fondue restaurant where they have live entertainment... belly dancers. Let's just pretend for a minute that this restaurant exists. We would be sitting on plush cushions in a dark candle lit corner of the restaurant... the darkest corner. In each corner there would be dark-haired beauties slithering along to the music making the air slightly warm. We would share all sorts of exotic foods dipped in hot, melted chocolate. The strawberries would arrive last, of course. Throughout the meal, we'd exchange stories of our past and hopes and dreams. Our hands would briefly touch every once in a while, maybe as you handed me a napkin or helped me up. After the meal, we'd leave and go to a bar on the beach where you sit on rugs in the sand. A live band would be there playing a who's who of rock's finest music. The night air would be soothing and relaxing. We'd both be drunk from having mentally stimulated one another over dinner. We would continue talking as the waves crashed on the shore.
At around one or two in the morning, I would be driven home. There would be so much tension that we'd both have butterflies. I'd get walked to my door and the man would slowly put his hand behind my neck and give me a kiss fit for an Aerosmith music video. He's tighten his grasp and run his hands through my hair. He'd then look into my eyes and we'd both know that the best was yet to come.
Well... want to tell me what your idea of a perfect date is? Don't worry... I won't bite.
Till next time...
To begin with, I have to admit that I have a penchant for men with long hair, tattoos don't hurt either. I've been this way since I was 15. So my date would start off by picking me up in an old car, preferably one from the 60's or 70's. He would knock on my door and he would wait a little before I opened up... make him sweat a bit. I would then open the front door in a black, vintage mini-dress and black, knee-high boots. These are not important facts but it's all in the details. He would be wearing faded jeans and a leather jacket. His hair would be down and he would smell like a man. There's nothing worse than being attacked by overpriced cologne. We would size each other up for a minute longing for the end of the night when that first kiss would happen. Sorry but you have to work for the meaningful things in life. Too much too soon has never been on my agenda. Like I said, a little sweating never hurt anybody. After the brief five minute physical approval we would drive off to a fondue restaurant where they have live entertainment... belly dancers. Let's just pretend for a minute that this restaurant exists. We would be sitting on plush cushions in a dark candle lit corner of the restaurant... the darkest corner. In each corner there would be dark-haired beauties slithering along to the music making the air slightly warm. We would share all sorts of exotic foods dipped in hot, melted chocolate. The strawberries would arrive last, of course. Throughout the meal, we'd exchange stories of our past and hopes and dreams. Our hands would briefly touch every once in a while, maybe as you handed me a napkin or helped me up. After the meal, we'd leave and go to a bar on the beach where you sit on rugs in the sand. A live band would be there playing a who's who of rock's finest music. The night air would be soothing and relaxing. We'd both be drunk from having mentally stimulated one another over dinner. We would continue talking as the waves crashed on the shore.
At around one or two in the morning, I would be driven home. There would be so much tension that we'd both have butterflies. I'd get walked to my door and the man would slowly put his hand behind my neck and give me a kiss fit for an Aerosmith music video. He's tighten his grasp and run his hands through my hair. He'd then look into my eyes and we'd both know that the best was yet to come.
Well... want to tell me what your idea of a perfect date is? Don't worry... I won't bite.
Till next time...
Tuesday, April 20, 2010
THE VOICE THAT MAKES ME DREAM
He was born on September 22, 1951 in Saltburn-by- the -Sea, North Yorkshire, England. As a teenager he was in numerous unknown bands and worked in a clothing shop until he saw an advertisement in 1973 in Melody Maker. A band was looking for a vocalist. He had no idea that he would ultimately be replacing Ian Gillan, who had given notice to leave the band. His name is Davis Coverdale and the band was Deep Purple.
The first time I heard Coverdale sing I was laying out by the pool feeling rather blue. The sunshine was swept away by a wave of clouds and it began to rain. I rushed inside and watched my plan of soaking up the sun go down the drain. All of a sudden, I heard a song come on the radio. It began like this: " I have often told you stories about the way. I lived the life of a drifter, waiting for the day..." It was the intro to " Soldier of Fortune". I was hooked. I was enamored and enchanted by this angelic yet pained voice filling the room with song. The song tells the story of a man who is lost, wishing his lover would stay. In my opinion, it's one of the most honest and moving ballads in rock history. It made me feel vulnerable and I could feel the sadness coming through the speakers. I immediately wanted to know everything bout the man with the golden voice. I had no idea that the lead singer of Whitesnake had also been in Deep Purple. For those of you who haven't heard "Soldier of Fortune" here are the lyrics and I hope you'll listen o the song.
I have often told you stories
About the way
I lived the life of a drifter
Waiting for the day
When I'd take your hand
And sing you songs
Then maybe you would say
Come lay with me love me
And I would surely stay
But I feel I'm growing older
And the songs that I have sung
Echo in the distance
Like the sound
Of a windmill goin' 'round
I guess I'll always be
A soldier of fortune
Many times I've been a traveller
I looked for something new
In days of old
When nights were cold
I wandered without you
But those days I thougt my eyes
Had seen you standing near
Though blindness is confusing
It shows that you're not here
Now I feel I'm growing older
And the songs that I have sung
Echo in the distance
Like the sound
Of a windmill goin' 'round
I guess I'll always be
A soldier of fortune
I can hear the sound
Of a windmill goin' 'round
I guess I'll always be
A soldier of fortune
Are you mesmerized? If you have good taste and know a thing or two about rock music then you'll feel the same way I do. My adoration of this song led me to a completely new side of Coverdale's capabilities as a singer. He'd already made me feel the anguish of lost love and yearning for someone to love. Now he proved that he had the powerful grit of a blues singer with "Mistreated." The song makes your blood pump and you feel like tearing off whatever is holding you down or making you ache and screaming " I've been mistreated! I've been abused!" The slithering guitar riffs by Ritchie Blackmore makes your spine tingle and our senses come to life. The permanent state of slumber so many people experience will dissolve after hearing a song that is packed full os sex, anger and pure blues rock-n-roll. The man with the voice that can make you weep as well as scream is David Coverdale. He is the voice of my emotions. Try him on for size and you'll be begging for more.
Till next time...
The first time I heard Coverdale sing I was laying out by the pool feeling rather blue. The sunshine was swept away by a wave of clouds and it began to rain. I rushed inside and watched my plan of soaking up the sun go down the drain. All of a sudden, I heard a song come on the radio. It began like this: " I have often told you stories about the way. I lived the life of a drifter, waiting for the day..." It was the intro to " Soldier of Fortune". I was hooked. I was enamored and enchanted by this angelic yet pained voice filling the room with song. The song tells the story of a man who is lost, wishing his lover would stay. In my opinion, it's one of the most honest and moving ballads in rock history. It made me feel vulnerable and I could feel the sadness coming through the speakers. I immediately wanted to know everything bout the man with the golden voice. I had no idea that the lead singer of Whitesnake had also been in Deep Purple. For those of you who haven't heard "Soldier of Fortune" here are the lyrics and I hope you'll listen o the song.
I have often told you stories
About the way
I lived the life of a drifter
Waiting for the day
When I'd take your hand
And sing you songs
Then maybe you would say
Come lay with me love me
And I would surely stay
But I feel I'm growing older
And the songs that I have sung
Echo in the distance
Like the sound
Of a windmill goin' 'round
I guess I'll always be
A soldier of fortune
Many times I've been a traveller
I looked for something new
In days of old
When nights were cold
I wandered without you
But those days I thougt my eyes
Had seen you standing near
Though blindness is confusing
It shows that you're not here
Now I feel I'm growing older
And the songs that I have sung
Echo in the distance
Like the sound
Of a windmill goin' 'round
I guess I'll always be
A soldier of fortune
I can hear the sound
Of a windmill goin' 'round
I guess I'll always be
A soldier of fortune
Are you mesmerized? If you have good taste and know a thing or two about rock music then you'll feel the same way I do. My adoration of this song led me to a completely new side of Coverdale's capabilities as a singer. He'd already made me feel the anguish of lost love and yearning for someone to love. Now he proved that he had the powerful grit of a blues singer with "Mistreated." The song makes your blood pump and you feel like tearing off whatever is holding you down or making you ache and screaming " I've been mistreated! I've been abused!" The slithering guitar riffs by Ritchie Blackmore makes your spine tingle and our senses come to life. The permanent state of slumber so many people experience will dissolve after hearing a song that is packed full os sex, anger and pure blues rock-n-roll. The man with the voice that can make you weep as well as scream is David Coverdale. He is the voice of my emotions. Try him on for size and you'll be begging for more.
Till next time...
Monday, April 19, 2010
LOVE IS A BATTLEFIELD
For thousands of years people have analyzed, written about and obsessed about love. From Shakespeare to Margaret Mitchell, writers and poets have have written countless stories about every kind of love under the sun. Films like Titanic or A Streetcar Named Desire have made us hope to be struck with the fire and passion that being in love brings. Songs ranging from U2's "With or Without You" to Deep Purple's "Mistreated" take us on a journey where we can feel the agony and longing that comes hand in hand with falling for someone. It doesn't matter if it's love at first sight, friendship that turns into a relationship or a passionate one night stand the results are usually the same. My question is: With all the books, music and films that describe every aspect of love, how come we are still so clueless about one of the oldest topics in history?
I think... let me re-phrase that, I know that it's because we are our own worst enemy. We don't listen to our gut instinct, which is usually right. We want immediate satisfaction and we don't want to work at anything in matters of the heart. We expect too much from others and compare them to the perfect, imaginary partner in our minds. As a child, I was madly in love with Val Kilmer in "Willow." His portrayal of Mad Martigan was my idea of the ideal man. He was a warrior, brave to the bone, dark, seductive, funny and loyal. Unfortunately, as I grew older I realized that if I set the bar at that level I would be alone forever. I had to realize that the hero in my head would only come to life in dreams or fantasies. There's no war, or poverty, or disease in our imagination. It's like our own little piece of heaven where knights in shining armors do exist.
In the real world, fear and fear alone, is why love is still nature's best kept secret because there's no book or commandments on how to find it. Love isn't perfect sex, perfect friendship or perfect minds coming together. Love is about finding an imperfect person perfectly. It's about understanding that life is the battlefield and it's better if you have someone by your side to fight the war with you. Most people run away if there's intimacy problems, financial woes or misunderstandings. They forget that for every problem there is always a solution. Self-help books aren't going to give you the golden ticket and money only buys happiness just for a moment. Love is the only thing that cannot be bought. It usually has to be earned.
People confuse love and lust on a daily basis. I've done it countless times in my life. You meet someone that you find unbelievably attractive physically and that ignites all your senses during intimacy and you think it's true love. After that, if they turn out to be the worst possible mate we make excuses for them to keep that lust alive. Wrong!! You are on dangerous territory and you won't keep your head above water for much longer.
Let me tell you a little tale: When I was eighteen, I met a man that was much older than me. I thought he was Don Juan DeMarco come to life. I longed for his presence all day long and stayed awake at night fretting about when I would see him again. Lust was the only component in this relationship that made it last as long as it did... three years to be exact. This man manipulated me to the very end and left me lifeless and sick. He was a monster. He wasn't my friend, he wasn't around when I had problems or needed him for support and he couldn't have cared less about my well-being since he got me addicted to drugs. I still believed that he was the one, forgiving all his mistakes for the one element that was strong... lust.
Do yourself a favor. Stop searching for love. Stop staying in abusive relationships with people that are practically sucking you dry like a vampire. Love is the little things. Watching a sunset together, being there when they're sick, wanting them to succeed and listening to their hopes and dreams. Fear and selfishness are incredibly difficult to extinguish but when you meet the one it won't be impossible an longer.
When it comes to love be a realist. Don't fear the unknown and recoil into your shell at the first sign of a speed bump. In that respect, be like Mad Martigan. Be brave and be bold because you may never get that chance again. True love is worth fighting for and you will have to fight for it. Anything you obtain too easily is usually misleading.
A poet once said that "It's so easy, To think about Love, To Talk about Love, To wish for Love, But it's not always easy, To recognize Love, Even when we hold it.... In our hands." Can you deal with that?
Till next time...
I think... let me re-phrase that, I know that it's because we are our own worst enemy. We don't listen to our gut instinct, which is usually right. We want immediate satisfaction and we don't want to work at anything in matters of the heart. We expect too much from others and compare them to the perfect, imaginary partner in our minds. As a child, I was madly in love with Val Kilmer in "Willow." His portrayal of Mad Martigan was my idea of the ideal man. He was a warrior, brave to the bone, dark, seductive, funny and loyal. Unfortunately, as I grew older I realized that if I set the bar at that level I would be alone forever. I had to realize that the hero in my head would only come to life in dreams or fantasies. There's no war, or poverty, or disease in our imagination. It's like our own little piece of heaven where knights in shining armors do exist.
In the real world, fear and fear alone, is why love is still nature's best kept secret because there's no book or commandments on how to find it. Love isn't perfect sex, perfect friendship or perfect minds coming together. Love is about finding an imperfect person perfectly. It's about understanding that life is the battlefield and it's better if you have someone by your side to fight the war with you. Most people run away if there's intimacy problems, financial woes or misunderstandings. They forget that for every problem there is always a solution. Self-help books aren't going to give you the golden ticket and money only buys happiness just for a moment. Love is the only thing that cannot be bought. It usually has to be earned.
People confuse love and lust on a daily basis. I've done it countless times in my life. You meet someone that you find unbelievably attractive physically and that ignites all your senses during intimacy and you think it's true love. After that, if they turn out to be the worst possible mate we make excuses for them to keep that lust alive. Wrong!! You are on dangerous territory and you won't keep your head above water for much longer.
Let me tell you a little tale: When I was eighteen, I met a man that was much older than me. I thought he was Don Juan DeMarco come to life. I longed for his presence all day long and stayed awake at night fretting about when I would see him again. Lust was the only component in this relationship that made it last as long as it did... three years to be exact. This man manipulated me to the very end and left me lifeless and sick. He was a monster. He wasn't my friend, he wasn't around when I had problems or needed him for support and he couldn't have cared less about my well-being since he got me addicted to drugs. I still believed that he was the one, forgiving all his mistakes for the one element that was strong... lust.
Do yourself a favor. Stop searching for love. Stop staying in abusive relationships with people that are practically sucking you dry like a vampire. Love is the little things. Watching a sunset together, being there when they're sick, wanting them to succeed and listening to their hopes and dreams. Fear and selfishness are incredibly difficult to extinguish but when you meet the one it won't be impossible an longer.
When it comes to love be a realist. Don't fear the unknown and recoil into your shell at the first sign of a speed bump. In that respect, be like Mad Martigan. Be brave and be bold because you may never get that chance again. True love is worth fighting for and you will have to fight for it. Anything you obtain too easily is usually misleading.
A poet once said that "It's so easy, To think about Love, To Talk about Love, To wish for Love, But it's not always easy, To recognize Love, Even when we hold it.... In our hands." Can you deal with that?
Till next time...
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